if you want to be a free-thinking individual and live in a small town in a conservative culture, you had best be an extreme introvert as well.
i love the author meindert dejong. he wrote a book called "along came a dog", much of which is about chickens.
the chickens are sadly reminiscent of many groups i have been a part of.
there is a pecking order. individuality, curiosity, intelligence, having a different background
-and especially having a different opinion-
will be pecked.
some things there is simply no changing.
some people there is simply no teaching.
I love that first line you wrote, and I agree. I am an introvert by nature, but since I've moved back to my hometown due to my husband's earlier job loss ( he has another one now, thank goodness), a small town in the South where people are conservative by default, I've become more introverted. We don't fit in due to our education levels and pasts of having been many other places and having a big worldview. Much of my family here is really far right conservative and campaigns fervently for that, so even there there is no respite from insanity. To live as anything other than an introvert would be painful and unproductive for me and others, and the upside is, I've been quite productive in the things that matter to me. The other free thinkers I know here are much the same--introverted and carving out their little piece of privacy. If I stated my opinions on practices that others don't even blink at (like insane patriotic/nationalistic stuff in churches here or the ridiculous materialism that is just normal), I'd be shunned. It is enough to buy a house in "that" neighborhood (the horror of a mixed race neighborhood! *rolls eyes*) and not conform totally.
ReplyDeleteBut I have promised myself that if I am moved in love to speak, I will. It's not easy to keep quiet, especially when many people have no trouble with speaking out in hate or ignorance.
Honestly, I'm hoping to leave at some point. For now, though, this was the best decision. But I'm making plans for when I'm older not to be here. We'll see. :)
~L
good luck! i'm glad you were able to identify with my rant :) your situation does sound frustrating in a similar way to mine.
Deleteour house is on the market and my hubby has been transferred to a more urban area, so we are also hoping for the best.